Rules dating not exclusive
But as Coleman says, "You can't keep someone interested if they're not." Besides, why waste your time and effort trying to make a relationship happen if it's not meant to?On the other hand, it's so easy to get hung up on timelines, especially when you first start dating.If your partner can't listen to you and be your shoulder to lean on in those first three months, Daniels says your relationship may not make it long-term.You shouldn't necessarily dump all your deepest and darkest fears to them right away.Although every relationship differs, three months is considered to be the average length of the first stage of a relationship.According to psychotherapist and relationship coach, Toni Coleman, LCSW, you should be ideally making that transition from "casually dating" to "exclusive" around that time.
"Some would say that this may be stemming from a fear of reaching that 100 days mark, so you need to take some serious personal and couple inventory (though you may not want to call it that), and see what it is that you have here," he says.
"It establishes a level of trust and strength for both of you to feel comfort when seeking comfort." If your partner can't be that for you, that's not a great sign.
It's one thing to say that you should go away together for the weekend, and it's another to actually book everything and hash out the logistics.
"In a new relationship, both partners should be mutually invested in spending time getting to know the other person," she says.
"This should be equally reciprocated on both ends." "The first few months are often all persona, all pretense," Caleb Backe, Health and Wellness Expert for Maple Holistics, tells Bustle.
Because as amazing as those new love feels are, those first 90 days can determine whether or not your new relationship is the real thing or has an expiration date.