Dating violence cycle of abuse
That’s why in general terms that victim potentially will seek an abuser, at the unconscious level of course,” Pelaéz said.“That’s where they find a certain level of comfort because that’s their normal, that’s what they grew up knowing.” Pelaéz has witnessed this truth firsthand with the hundreds of women she and her staff serve at the Battered Women and Children’s Shelter, a facility run by Family Violence Prevention Services, that offers free residential services, therapy, legal and medical assistance, childcare and a suite of other resources to women and children who have recently left abusive environments.An overwhelming number of these women, Pelaéz said, have been in similar relationships since they were teenagers. From the age of 19, she was in a 21-year abusive relationship with her now ex-husband. Initiative, and Awaaz, are three others that offer training programs, free resources for victims, and community-wide awareness education.The abuse started “as soon as he “I’ve had my head split open, I’ve had my face reconstructed, and (I’ve had) the mental and emotional abuse, too, like controlling me, controlling sex, controlling money, controlling who I can talk to,” she said. FVPS even offers healing programs and classes for perpetrators, too.“But the one emotion that determines and, for me, defines if there’s abuse or not is if one of them is afraid of the other.” Cases of domestic and dating violence often go unreported, but most that are reported are collected from the National Teen Dating Violence hotline.Texas ranks number two in the nation for call volume to the hotline and San Antonio ranks number four in the state behind Houston, Dallas, and Austin.
But those controlling behaviors can escalate and eventually lead to complete isolation of the victim from family and friends. Jealousy is a common, yet confusing, element in abusive teenage relationships, Pelaéz said.It’s only a matter of time before behaviors escalate to a more serious level, Pelaéz said. Victims and perpetrators often subconsciously imitate the behaviors of family members on either side of an abusive relationship.